I have community and connection

Why do I need to come here and be with ‘you lot’?  That used to go through my head.  Why would I want to be with these people who, apparently, couldn’t manage their own lives and needed to share all their deepest and darkest moments with each other.  I soon learnt why.  I needed them.  And they needed me too.  To be there with them, to witness them.  And I needed that.  Despite my misgivings, I needed them.  At my first meeting, I kept my coat on, my legs crossed, my arms folded.  I didn’t join in, I wouldn’t read.  I made it perfectly clear that I was not accepting of this thing.  Yet, they waited for me.  They were patient, they knew that if I was ready then I would come.  And on the day that I was ready, they took me in and loved me until l could love myself.  They still do.  They may not always like me.  Sometimes in my recovery I have been difficult and uncooperative.  But that’s what happens.  It is in my community that I have practiced my sobriety skill set, that I have been held.  It is important, actually essential, that I have a team to go to.  Our families and friends may not want to know anything about our sobriety.  They may choose not to accept it or validate it.  They might find it tedious.  We may have things that we cannot share with our friends or family, that we need to speak out loud in a place of trust and understanding. 

My sober community is there for me, always, as I am there for them.